Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Between you, me and the blog post

Sorry for the lack of posts recently. I can't really explain it. I've just been a little down. Maybe it is winter? Maybe it is a bit of the ol' black dog? Maybe I'm coming down from gossip columnists' high? Who can say?
Whatever it is, I've been feeling a little blue.
I've also been getting exceedingly frustrated and angry with the level of racism in this country, but that's another story.
There are some things which have been cheering me up. Not as much as rolling home to find Wentworth Miller waiting for me in bed or finding Edward Cullen has renounced his heterosexuality, but they are little things which have brought me cheer.
For instance, I've started getting up an hour earlier and spending the extra time in a cafe studying my Russian. It's doing wonders for my Russian skills - which have been as neglected as a grampa in a kerosene bath.
Then there is Thom, who's every apologetic-please-don't-beat-me-again-Chris-Brown facial expression melts my hard-bastard heart.
Then there is the notion I can look forward in just a few short months to being back in Europe - where I always thought I'd spend my life but have, in fact, spent precious little of it - and seeing Dancing Daniel, Pennells, London, Paris, Berlin and Barcelona. I would marry any of them but four of them are cities.
Then there is, which can quite literally stop me from trying to slash my finger tips open on the cheaply serrated edge of my tape dispenser. Oh, drunken shame. How I love thee as applied to others.
And lastly, there is the chicken murder trial. I cannot get enough of this. I look forward to my daily instalment in the paper with the kind of relish teenage boys reserve for sexting. It's so salacious. Our reporter at work, who is a good chum, said the other day he is pretty much writing it with me in mind as his audience. Which is flattering but means he's probably leaving behind anyone who doesn't have my appreciation of the absurd.
Every twist and turn fascinates me. Consider the facts, really. One of two gay millionaires, made rich through a chicken meat franchise, kills the other and then goes shopping with his 19-year-old gay lover, known only to readers as Mr X because his identity has to be protected. There are bloodstains in the bed, an in conclusive post mortem, photos tucked under the bed of Mr X in a choir uniform... and it's all made all the more tantalising by the fact Pennells used to live in the same apartment block and I've been drunk just a couple of metres from the scene of the death. I can almost taste this case.
I don't know what I'm going to do when this trial is over. I hope to God there is an appeal.
Anyway, if you see me looking glum, kick me in the shins and give me something moan about.


Anonymous said...

I have been laughing out loud about textsfromlastnight, every time I read it. I go there everyday.

Gold from today included
(305): Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
(615): She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister

Gotta love it!!

Big Man H said...

I can only hope my dear that you find as much enjoyment if i get murdered. It would put my soul at ease.

I don't know if i'd want the legacy of "the chicken lover" though.

Dave said...

I've been meaning to blog on the chicken murders - I'm totally with you. I LOVE reading all the gory details. It makes me feel kind of embarrassed and voyeuristic, but really, it's like a trashy soap opera.