The French hqve q different keyboqrd1

I dont hqve ti,e to try qnd type properly so youre going to hqve to reqd qround the interesting spelling. LOL sorry everyone.
From where I last left off we headed back to London via York. On the night of my birthday I went to the Lily Allen concert at the Hammersmith Apollo. It was brilliant. It was the only time in the whole day that actually felt like my birthday but it was brilliant. Unforgettable and the perfect thing to do on my birthday.
Two days around London was great for exploring and last night we went to Equus with Daniel Radcliffe, Richard Griffiths and Jenny Agutter. Awesome in the extreme.
Tonight I am in Paris. Everyone else in the world gets from London to Paris in a few hours, but no, not the Hatches. We took the ferry, didnt we? Even Hilter marched in quicker than us. It took us 12hrs from leaving one hotel to getting to thee next.
It went something like this:
8am, leave hotel. Walk to tube, tqke tube, get off tube, walk to train station, get on train to Dover, get off train, get on bus to ferry, wait at port, take bus to ferry, get on ferry, ferry crosses channel, get off ferry, learn french, get on bus to train station, get off bus, get on train, ride train, chqnge trqins, ride train, get off train in Paris, walk to hotel.
Our hotel is next to a brothel. In fact it is surrounded by brothels. And sex cinemas and live shows, etc. The hotel is very dodgy and I think the beds are left over from one of the brothels. If I dont co,e ho,e with crotch pheasants Ill be surprised. The room has two french doors to re,ind us where we are and the second one i can open should i desire the whole of paris to watch me piss. The bloke in the hotel roo, across the rue looks up for it.
Dad is grasping French beautifully. French, his way, sounds remqrkqbly like English only said more slowly and much louder.
"do you speak english?"
"no"
"WE. ARE. TRYING. TO. FIND..." etc, you get the picture.
The French, bless them, are terribly patient and helpful.
This keyboqrd is reqlly giving ,e the shits so im going to go. Much love, Dan xxx